1.27.2002

As if a quiet storm approaching on the horizon... Feb. 12 is coming up. It will have been one year since the last time I talked to Madonna. That final phone call... How do I feel about it a year later? Truthfully it doesn't cross my mind a whole lot anymore. Nor does she, besides out of my usual thought process. I guess lately she has been, however. It does not bother me. Maybe I just don't like having unanswered questions about her, or wondering what her life is like now. In what sense should I care? Why do I bother at all?

Also - Feb. 14 is Valentine's day. Or the 2nd annual "Single person awareness day" :( It is hard to believe that I have been alone this long... I have not had an appreciable girlfriend in... hrmmmm... let me think. Probably around a year and a half. After years of being in serious relationships... one after another.

I have money, and I have gotten my life together in that time. I would say that relationships are bad for me, but I would be lying. I let my personal life destroy school on more than one occasion, and I do not wish to have it happen again. I don't think I will ever let it.

... Everything comes together, even as others fall apart.

You want most what you cannot have. Funny how what I do have I care little for. Well, in relation to other things. My lifestyle is comfortable...

I just have a few questions. Where are you? When are you?

I have given up the pursuit for now. If it happens, it happens... I just have other things to attend to.

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