[x] Cardi Ex Machina.

cliche to even say

that if you bothered to touch my heart

you would find it broken

yet still beating

powered by the machinations of my denial

my vain pride

cardi ex machina

when i tell myself

that i am not a walking consolation prize

[x]No Better.

we are fallen
yet angels just the same
we atone
by justifying our transgressions
galvanized by pain
yet strip mined by guilt
no better
than the ones who stole our grace

[x]Interchangeable Alibis.

In the past
there is no opportunity
only certainty
present purgatory
and the future
paved in the blocks of time
in these interchangeable alibis
I cannot remember to forgive you

[x]cipher horizon.

how can you not see it?
it's all there
my whole life on display
i lie in wait
but cannot lie just the same
single truth is nothing more
than looking between the lines
of my delicate horizon
waiting to be undone
by the simplest of ciphers

[x]How To Destroy Muses.

the difference thin
between stricken and smitten
to this day
i can feel the blackness on my heart
as your poison
still courses it's way through my veins
seems all i can do is wait
until it breaks
this opposite of a fever in me

[x]novacaine shade.

my novacaine heart
leaves me on floor
switching places with my shadow
it now stands in my place
and i am dragged
by the very shade of me

[x]the loudest silence.

all said and done
i miss feeling your heart beat
though i loathe the way
that you handled mine in return
these last drops of ink
will bleed from within
until there's nothing left to say
this void filled simply
with the loudest silence ever

[x]ember.

the ember grows cold
as you take your flame away from me
something still burns
when the thought of you occurs
yet i am spared my eyes
not having to see you
these tiny hurts
are but paper cuts on my heart
yet wounds just the same

[x]we move on.

...miss the sound of my voice
the feel of my eyes
the burning of my soul
the sense of being drawn
the overbearing of my heart
the power of my words
the beauty of our eden
the intoxication of our presence
the sparks of every touch
that very calculation in our romance
and, most of all -
the sophistication of my love

[x]hiding in plain sight.

shell shocked and numb
i walk the line between hope and despair
how quickly this all unraveled
these words my very blood
so what will happen
when i run out of poetry in this disconnect?
no longer have to see me hiding in plain sight
my will to power and weakness
yet she called me nonchalant